Wednesday, February 12, 2014

How we manage the Ups and Downs of traveling as a couple

If you've been following my love story, then you already know that I've been in a relationship since 2007. And it is through our 6 years of being together and of traveling as a couple, did we come to know the best and the worst parts of each other. And since it's the love month, I'll be sharing how Rubel and I manage some of the joys and woes of wandering together.



"Arguments and fights will happen when you travel together. It can make or break you."

Rubel and I would usually fight over things whenever we'd go on trips. So it became a constant thing during our first few years together. We used to even sleep through the night with only our backs faced at each other. And I even walked out on him at one time (this happened after going around Marina Bay Sands in Singapore --- he just followed me until we got a ride home). So it was that intense between us. But these "drama's" lessened through time, as we eventually learned how to adjust with each others moods and needs. 

Our first major fight was actually back in Macau. I created our trip itinerary and did all the research then, so I assumed that I would get the directions right. But when we were getting lost already (we couldn't find where the Sau Paulo Ruins were), he eventually lashed out at me by saying that it's time to ask the locals in the area. I could be really stubborn, so I stayed firm with my decisions. But thanks to his efforts, we eventually found the Senate Square. There were no apologies made thereafter. I guess the scenic sights just drew us back together as if nothing happened. But of course, we still resolved everything before going to sleep that night.


"Fix your problems with some humor and laughter. It will keep you sane during long travels."

One of the things that I love about being best friends with my travel buddy is that we can laugh about anything (no matter how complex situations may get).

Rubel and I actually have this really unforgettable experience while backpacking in Ilocos. Just as we were heading to Laoag (via bus from Vigan), a lady aboard started selling her homemade 'Kalamay'. So Rubel bought a few and gave me a piece to try. Nothing really happened to us when we transferred buses in Laoag. But an hour later (we were bound for Pagudpud at this point), he started to complain on how his stomach was getting more and more upset by the minute. We still had an hour left to our trip yet he kept hesitating about stepping out of the vehicle. And when he couldn't take the pain anymore, he urged for us to get out of the bus immediately. I had no choice but to go down with him, despite my worries of not being able to board another bus for the next hour or so (it felt like we were in the middle of nowhere!). But I was terribly worried for Rubel since he already considered taking a dump by the 'Talahiban' (also known as large weeds with pointy edges). He was that desperate. But luckily, we were able to find a store nearby that had an open restroom. I was already laughing while this 'chaos' was happening ---- until I started feeling that same churn in my stomach. 


I was blaming him for getting food poisoned and for offering me that kalamay. Yet we were doing all of these while bantering and pooping (we were just a few cubicles away!). Anyway... if there's one thing I've learned, then that's sharing a good laugh with your beau while being in a very embarrassing moment. It truly helps take out the tension. I swear, this particular story still keeps us laughing until now.

"There should always be a give and take on both sides, wherever place you may find yourselves in."

It pays to give and take when you're traveling with your partner (or with life in general). So learn to compromise and learn to adjust. Also try to deviate from your plans, especially if your partner wants to try something new.

I had to learn about Rubel's pet-peeve of me just recently. He said that he didn't like the part of me that doesn't like to veer from a well laid-out plan (also known as my trip itinerary), especially if I was the one who prepared it. He confessed that it was hard for him to ask if it would be possible to visit this or eat that, as I would always have a fitting "reply". So guys, the next time you work on your travel plans, make it a point to ask your partner where s/he wants to go and what s/he wants to try out. Believe me, your beau will appreciate the time that you've allotted for him/her.

"Always motivate each other."

I'm not the adventurous type when it comes to traveling. So it was a completely new thing for me when Rubel and I started going on trips. I could say that he's more of the adventurous type. So he was able to motivate me on how to face some of my fears. 

He got me to face my fear of heights when we did the Sky Experience Adventure together in Cebu. He got me to face my fear of driving when we raced for 8 laps at Cebu's Kartzone. He also urged me to get into an inflated raft just so we could go river rafting in Cagayan De Oro (although drowning wasn't something that I wanted to experience over and over). So I really owe it to Rubel for always encouraging me to try new things. 


"Knowing that he's there gives me that added security while traveling."

There were times when we'd get sick while on the road. So I appreciated having Rubel beside me all the more. He would take care of me, and I with him. The last time that we experienced a major scare was when he got food poisoned. We were already in Pagudpud at the time. I was already asking where the nearest hospital was, just in case his condition worsened. But thankfully, the meds that I brought helped hydrate him.

"We've come to embrace the Ups and Downs of traveling as a couple because..."

...at the end of the day, you will always have that one person who will look after you when you sleep through the night bus; someone who will nurse you to health when you get sick on the road; someone who will hug and kiss you after fighting with you over some confusing map direction/s; someone who will laugh with you when embarrassing moments take place; someone who will try that icky-looking food with you just for the sake of trying; and someone who will hold your hand when the plane goes on a turbulent fit.

These are just some of the things (good and bad) that I love experiencing whenever I travel with Rubel. It's also journeying off with him that continually reminds me of the kind of life that I've always dreamt of having in a partner --- perfectly imperfect.

Explore & Be Free!
Mai




This is my contribution to Pinoy Travel Blogger's FEBRUARY 2014 BLOG CARNIVAL entitled " The JOYS AND WOES OF LOVE ON THE ROAD" hosted by Claire Madarang of Traveling Light . You can check the previous monthly blog carnival topics by clicking this LINK.

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